can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.