he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
so much tequila, so little girl.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
