based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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