i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize