Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize