I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
