Tell her she can't have a vagina
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
