Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize