I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
