I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Randomize
