I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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