There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
