wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
