strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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