Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
