Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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