Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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