I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
