she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
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