We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
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