stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
