she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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