Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
he thought i was a dude.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Randomize
