You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize