proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
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She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
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The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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