That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Randomize