Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
