their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
