Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
