Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize