How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Randomize