Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
