He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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