he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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