Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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