Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
