He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
