i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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