i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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