She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
