I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
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I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
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I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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