you guys were way drunker than both of me
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
