Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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