If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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