I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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