Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
