Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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