can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
