At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
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