I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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